things arent the same.i'm not gonna visit your blog and read wad you typed anymore.that blog used to be a place where i'll get to see how much happiness we used to have.but now?i should not have went to read it.yes i'm such a person who dont understnd you at all.if you think that what i said to you over those SMSes are saying how bad you are in my heart,i've got nth to say.things are not the same anymore since last yr oct.28th was no longer a date to rmb anymore.yes you're right.looking at those sweet memories we had,we're such a great item and how much i enjoyed being there in the story.
what i said possessive was that you got so fucking upset when i spend more time with others as compared to you and of cos i do know when you love someone alot you'll get so gaga over him/her and feel all sorts of emotions even if he/she is using her phone or talking to friends.i do know becos i went through what you're going through now.but you know what,when you're at my this age looking back,you'll feel so funny over it.so you understand why i said you're childish and looking things on the surface only?its not that i dont understand but now i'm 19yrs old and i look at things differently.eg if i like someone -> (the 17yrs old me in the past) i'll go so fucking gaga over that person and tried all means to get close and know that person well. (the 19yrs old me now) i'll keep quiet and do nothing and make sure that person is happy.
now you get it how i see things now?now you know what i meant when i said you two are childish?
alot of times i told you before you aint the way you are now when i first met you.and the reasons i gave when i asked for a broke up,you did not improved on them,or maybe should i say you did,but in a wrong way.
each time we argued i did not complain or find someone to share my unhappiness.i kept them within me although alot of times i just felt like giving up on you and move on.but when i was about to give up and move on,i asked myself this, "how would i feel if all of a sudden i wont be talking to you or seeing you in my everyday life?" maybe you cant keep things to yourself like what you told me,but i dont like a 3rd party to get involve with us when she's your friend whereby you're seeking help and advices.i just dont like it becos she cant do anything to help or what.and of cos she'll think on your side more than thinking on my side.
if you think i'm not showing you enough attention or care,i think you're wrong.it's just that i dont do things visibly anymore.
idk how am i gna forgive&forget what had happen although how much i wish things between us are alright and fine.i'm sorry.
told you alot of times to move on and find someone better but you just wont.
sigh..